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Indians are the most Racist people on the planet, possibly the Milky Way

Its true.


Sad isn't it? Yesterday being Independence day and all. I mean, what exactly are we celebrating? 100 years of struggle to overthrow the British Raj, only to be bogged down by 67 years of self-directed oppression?


The common human being in India is oppressed in many many ways. Sometimes I wonder if my fellow citizens actually invent ways of oppression - desi ishtyle, forming special oppression sub-committees and all. But you know the form of oppression that really really ticks me off? The prejudice against each and every melanocyte of dark-colored skin. Its like there is this hidden graph somewhere, that shows there must be a positive linear (almost exponential) correlation between the color of someone's skin and their worth. The lighter your skin color, the more popular, sexy, hot or generally awesome you are. And don't even get me started with how this mostly applies to women. Just thinking about this is making me punch a hole in my keyboard, which incidentally, already has the "F" and the "D" keys missing - so you can imagine the words I would like to use but which I'm not able to.


What is it with Indians and skin-color? 


I mean, why Oh WHY, in Thalaiva's name does a movie titled "Chennai Express" feature a female lead whose skin color is utterly unrepresentative of how a woman from the very southern city of Chennai looks like? Heck, why doesn't any movie made in the south have any female lead actors who look vaguely like someone who is actually from the south? Why does a woman's arranged-marriage-worthiness literally depend on her being "black" or "white" or "wheatish" or whateverish? Let me tell you why. Because Indians are by far, the most racist, skin-color obsessed bigots in the world, possibly the universe. Multiverse you say? Well, bring 'em on!


And just in the spirit of the super-special sub-sub-micro-committee for equal opportunities for oppression, dear Innocent Indian boy who can see no wrong, speak no wrong, do no wrong - you think you can escape? WRONG! You're going to social hell for being born on the wrong end of the melanin gradient, my unfortunate friend. You know what you should do? Blame your genetics (and hence your parents). Oh wait, your parents are also dark-skinned. My bad. Well, I guess the only scientific explanation is that your friggin' melanocytes are cursed dude. Don't believe me? Check out this advertisement where none other than ol' King Khan endorses a "skin whitening" cream for men. Just apply that cream three times a day, everyday, and you won't need anything else to pataofy that fair-skinned girl. More than that cream, nothing can give you, a Mard, Zyada...not even those pills you ordered from a company whose ad you received in your spam folder.


Now before you go all nerdy on me and disdainfully ask "Where's the data for all this?", hold your priuses (prii?) and Check out the graph below:
The silver medal people! 2nd! We might as well be the Gold medalists, Jordan is virtually absent...compared to that big red thing I call home. Feature in the fact that we're the second most populous nation, and you'e got an endless racist abyss. CAN YOU BELIEVE THIS? Just imagine, if LMFAO were born in India, the song would be "Racist and I know it!". I mean, if this graph tells us anything, it is that, in addition to being racist, Indians are (a) Dumb (b) Arrogant or (c) both - beacause my fellow citizens would be honest about not preferring someone else other than their own race as their neighbors. Hey, atleast they're honest about it right? Just think about it - if the secret Indian racists "came out", then the guy who made the above map would have to massively increase the scale on the racist end and India would be white hot (pun unintended of course).


Fast forward another 67 years. And what do we want - as Indians, as people of the biggest democratic social experiment? Do we, mahilas and mards, want a county where cruel, unjust and exploitative companies like Emami (Fair and Handsome) and Hindustan Unilever (Fair and Lovely) come up with a method to supply genetically engineered uberwhite Organ transplants - after all, the skin is the largest organ. Or do we want an India where each and every human being - dark, light, or anything in between, is treated with respect. 


Do we not want an India where every individual is comfortable, literally, in his or her own skin?



P.S.: If you feel as ticked off about this issue as I do, then I strongly urge you to sign this petition on Change.org, arranged by the Dark is beautiful campaign organized by the good folk over at Women of Worth.

The original article where the racial tolerance map appeared can be found here.
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